Who hasn’t woken up on New Years Day (or in a drunken stupor on New Years Eve) with the massive sense of starting the New Year off right and accomplish a life-long wanted task, need, or want? Unless you’re under the age of 13, you’ve probably committed yourself to such a New Years Resolution and broken it within the first week. It all comes down to how much self-discipline the resolutioner has, how great the desire, or sometimes it comes down to the almighty dollar that destroys our dreams of such an endeavor. Can you do it this year? Who knows, but one does get a two-thumbs up just for trying.

Personally, it’s the first time in about 25 New Years where I haven’t opted to lose weight for my own resolution. I can’t remember that last time that I was actually happy with my weight. After all, I’m going to be 40 this year, and if I’m too thin, lines will appear on my face, and I rather enjoy people mistaking me for someone younger and getting carded. I should resolve to do a number of things to better my current situation, but I’ve decided to keep things on the “light side”, as one of my goals for the year is to eliminate unnecessary stress and not to take life so seriously. So here I go! Here is my Top 17 (soon to be broken) New Years Resolutions for 2008:

17. To finally visit my favorite named town in the US- “Happyland, Connecticut”. It’s real, just look at the map: Happyland, Ct.

16. To stop saying, when I don’t want to do something, “I’d rather clean the bathroom with my tongue.” [Read more →]